Getting closer...

Now I have to be careful. It is ALMOST done and one carefree blast of painting could ruin what's working here. It's so close... I just have to pay attention to each area and think about what's missing and only add that. There needs to be a little more flow to link the right side with the left side.

TODAY'S GOAL: Start some smaller paintings.

Here are four 10" x 10" canvases I began today. Having fun, feeling the groove again, life is good.

Back in action

This is my second stamp set available at www.livefunky.etsy.com (the first set sold). There are more on the way so stay tuned!

I've been away for a little bit but I'm happy to report that it's been to enjoy some summer fun. Entertaining company, visiting family and friends and enjoying my husband's family reunion in New Hampshire. Which, by the way, has me dreaming of moving back to New Hampshire to some fabulous lake house... a girl can dream! I feel so rejuvenated and ready to work hard doing what I love.

Earlier this summer I hit a bit of a roadblock and I'm thankful for my husband and dear friends for some really great, illuminating conversations getting to the heart of the issue and then getting beyond it, letting the baggage go. When I opened my second shop www.jessicatorrant.etsy.com I had such high hopes and aspirations, which was great but it also left me feeling somewhat timid and doubtful of my ability. I think this might be the first time since my sophomore year in college that I really felt completely lost creatively and it scared me - was it gone, was it over, would it ever return? Again, it was heart to hearts with my best of friends that led me to the answer - the same answer I've stumbled into any time I've run into a mental hurtle creatively. I have to let go of definitions/plans/expectations and just be in the moment, follow my instincts and let them take me where they will. Trying to define myself destroys the intuitive source that I rely on to create art. Examining the internal conversations and definitions I have makes me realize that I feed off of plans and lists and I don't have to stop doing that, but I have to stop holding myself to them. It's inevitable that half the things on any particular list or dream sheet will change tomorrow or in a few weeks - and I need to be ok with that. So, long story short, I'm feeling very light and optimistic and eager to be free to have fun painting again, something I love so very, very much.

Tests = Lessons Learned

Test One, Test Two: Front, back

These two pendants are the best of the test subjects so far. I played around with using original art on paper and prints under the glass and I will continue to explore that, but I really like the look of these one of a kind reverse paintings/mixed media pieces. I worked with layers of acrylic paint, tissue paper, acrylic gel medium/varnish and a decorative paper backing. The whole look that I'm going for and the right materials to make that happen isn't quite there yet, but I learned a lot from these test works and they serve as a good taste for what you can expect in my Etsy shop shop very soon.

WORK WITH WHAT YOU'VE GOT

This has been my mantra lately and it's like an obvious light has been turned on. When things get tight, don't get desperate, work with what you've got. I tend to save things for the perfect time or occassion. Use it, utilize it, "Make it work!" as the great Tim Gunn would say. When times got tough before I'd get desperate. I don't need to explain how, but I did as an artist. NO MORE. It's proven that acts of desperation don't work, they are money and time (and inspiration too, ultimately) down the drain. So in these economic times, am I painting little cheap give away paintings?

NOPE - I'm painting huge monster paintings!

Something most of us artists discuss amongst ourselves is the balance between being the artist we want to be and the creative fears, personal doubts and concerns that limit us. We all seem to agree that when you make something that you think/hope others will like, they will see right through it, or as a good friend said, see it as "pandering" to your audience. Guilty as charged, but right now I'm not going to do it.

Right now I'm going for the full dream. I'm going for the monster jam.

What did I want/have on the to do list that I couldn't provide for this or that reason?
-My shed/studio to be heated
-Lots of new ready to hang canvases

What did I have? (work with what you've got)
-A relatively empty basement that's warm enough
-A bulk of unprimed canvas and a bucket of gesso

THIS PROVES SOMETHING I AM SEMI-WILLING TO ADMIT>>>>>
I am much more linear thinking that I thought I was.

How could an artist NOT be thinking, "Hey I've got this that and the other to work with, let's do this!" when you've got a bunch of canvas laying around? Apparently I really have been too focused on the business end of things and less as an artist true to her craft FIRST.

Being true to myself as a painter is what got me into this world of selling my art to people I don't know around the world. Putting it all out there, taking chances. The meat and pulp of the artist on display for all to see. This is what it is all about. Work with what you've got.

For this work in progress, let me first say this is prepared to be 36" x 75" long - it will be shipped unstretched so that the buyer's framer can stretch it for much cheaper than it would be for me to ship it stretched.

Canvas had been primed. (Since I'll be shipping these biggies unstretched, I'm thinking my next big purchase at the art supply store will be a roll of pre-primed canvas.) First gestures of paint. Not feeling it. Go for some sticks of loose charcoal to sketch out a composition.


The charcoal composition evolves...

Navy blue/black paint over sketched composition...

The first layers of paint.

There will be many more layers of paint over this. This is just a shadow or actually skeleton of what this painting will end up looking like, but it's fun to share the process with you.